Jessica McClure has a recurring nightmare. "I can hear my Momma talking," she says. "She keeps calling me, and she keeps asking me where I am, and I can't find her. I wake up scared."

Her dream, of course , echoes what actually happened to her on October 14, 1987, in her aunt's backyard. That morning, Cissy Porter, now 33, had run inside to answer the phone, leaving her daughter, Jessica, then 18 months old, playing with some other children. When she returned just moments later, Jessica had disappeared. The children pointed to an 8-inch hole in the ground and said the little girl had fallen down it. Cissy put her ear to the opening of the abandoned well shaft and heard her daughter crying. She thought her heart would stop. "I was devastated" she says.

Within an hour the entire city of Midland, Texas, had come together to help save the toddler who was wedged into a rocky crook 22 feet below the earth. She was dangling precariously-the well was believed to go deeper still. Oxygen was piped in and a microphone inserted so Cissy could talk to her daughter to try to keep her calm. Jessica listened and sang to herself "Jesus Loves Me" and the "Winnie-the-Pooh" song.

Afraid little Jessica might perish before they could reach her, rescuers worked around the clock, first drilling a 29 foot vertical shaft parallel to the well, then a five-foot-long horizontal tunnel through solid rock. Audiences around the world watched the drama unfold live on TV.

The crowds that had gathered near the site cheered wildly when Jessica was finally freed 58 hours later. She was rushed to the hospital in Midland, where doctors fought to stabilize her. She had large, open sores on her forehead and the back of her head where she'd been wedged against the sides of the narrow well shaft. Surgeons had to remove 60 percent of her right foot to save it from gangrene, taking extensive skin grafts from her thigh. The reconstructive work required 13 surgeries, nine blood transfusions and a six-week stay in the hospital.

Captivated by the story of the brave little girl, hundreds of people sent her flowers and presents. President Ronald Reagan called offering best wishes for Jessica's recovery. Since then, Cissy has tried to keep her daughter out of the spotlight, to give her a normal life. Has she succeeded?

"Yes," Jessica says, quietly. "And no."

"THESE SCARS ARE PART OF WHO I AM"

Like most 16-year-old's bedrooms, Jessica's reveals a mix of little girl and young woman: A giant Winnie-the-Pooh sits on her bed while photos of teen idols such as Josh Hartnett and the group 98 Degrees decorate her walls. "I'm really just like everybody else," she says. "It's more a big deal to other people than it is to me. They're like, wow, you're Jessica McClure."

In fact, Jessica didn't know anything about the accident until she saw a TV movie about it when she was 5. "People ask me all the time,'Do you remember anything about being in the well?' " Jessica says. "I don't. T didn't want to believe that anything that horrible happened to me." Since then, she rarely mentions it at home. "I don't think Momma likes to talk about it," Jessica says.

Cissy admits that she still feels guilty for leaving her daughter unattended that day even for a moment. "I don't know what I would have done if she hadn't survived," she says, crying easily. I don't even like to think about it."

Most of what Jessica has learned about the accident comes from her father, Chip McClure 33, who now lives in Tyler, Texas. (He and Cissy divorced in 1990.) When she was about 10, Chip took Jessica to see the well, which is now capped with her name and the date of the rescue inscribed on top.

Jessica says she feels a special bond with the men who worked so hard to rescue her. Earlier this year, she thanked the family of Robert O'Donnell, the paramedic who pulled her out of the well. O'Donnell committed suicide in April 1995. "I wanted to thank him but I couldn't, so I thanked his wife and son," Jessica says. "I told them how grateful I was. I know he didn't die saving me. but still, I lived and he died. He was one of those who was there the longest, trying to save me."

Today, when strangers meet Jessica, they often tell her they prayed for her rescue. But as she's learning, fame also has a downside. She's discovered that some kids want to be her friend only because of who she is. Sometimes she waits before telling them that she's the Jessica McClure.

And then there's the thorny issue of her family's financial situation. Many people in Midland believe that Cissy, who owns a pet-grooming business, and her second husband Tim Porter, a diesel mechanic, are wealthy because of all the money sent to Jessica by well-wishers after the accident. With the checks written in their names, Cissy and Chip bought the modest, three- bedroom brick home where Cissy, Tim, Jessica and Tim's daughter Christina, 19, live today. Checks made out directly to Jessica--at the time estimated to be more than $700,000 were placed in a trust neither Cissy nor Chip can access. (The family won't say how much money is in it today.) The trust pays Jessica's expenses, including her school tuition and clothing. The full sum will be turned over to her on her 25th birthday.

Cissy worries that her daughter, who has a soft heart, will be taken advantage of. "I tell her to spend only the interest, not the principal," she says. "That's her security blanket."

One thing Jessica won't spend the money on is surgery to get rid of her scars. "This boy asked me.'Can't you pay a plastic surgeon to fix everything?' I told him.'I'm not going to do that. I've lived with these scars fol fifteen years. Theylre part of who I am.'

"A LOT OF BAD THINGS GO THROUGH YOUR MIND WHEN YOUR CHILD IS SICK"

These days, Jessica faces a new threat to her health, this one as pnvate as her rescue from the well was public. For the past year, Jessica has been so sick with infections, a low-grade fever and swollen joints, that she's missed weeks of school. Her health problems began with her first case of mononucleosis when she was in fifth grade. Jessica suffered the classic symptoms of the disease: fever, fatigue, sore throat, and swollen lymph glands.

After months of recuperating, her condition improved, but less than a year later, she had a relapse. This time, the disease hit her harder. "She could hardly get out of bed" Cissy recalls. At times she was so weak she couldn't hold a pen. To keep up with her studies, Jessica dictated her homework to her mother.

The two bouts of mono kept Jessica out of school through half of fifth grade and much of sixth. For the next three years she was healthy. Then, in the summer before 10th grade, Jessica developed an infection after having her wisdom teeth removed. "She went downhill," says Cissy. "She spiked fevers, caught every germ."

Mystified, Jessica's doctor tested her for diseases that might be linked to the blood transfusions she'd received after her fall into the well, including HIV. The results were negative. He sent her to specialists, but none of them could figure out what was wrong with her either. When Jessica's joints began to swell, her doctor sent her to Texas Children's Hospital.

Shortly before her appointment with Call Demmler, M.D., a specialist in infectious diseases, Jessica complained of chest pain. Terrified, Cissy worried that her daughter had a heart condition. Meanwhile, Chip struggled with his own fears. "Leukemia was one possibility," he says. "A lot of bad things go through your mind when your child is sick."

Jessica, too, was frightened. "I hurt all the time," she says, "even in my sleep."

Demmler referred Jessica to a colleague at Texas Children's Hospital, Maria Perez, M.D., a pediatric rheumatologist. "My hands are swollen all the time," the teen told Perez. "I can't wear my rings anymore. And if I exercise, my joints hurt."

Perez sighed on hearing this description, then delivered the bad news to the girl and her mother: "I believe Jessica has juvenile rheumatoid arthritis."

An autoimmune disorder, juvenile rheumatoid arthritis (JRA) causes inflammation, redness and soreness in joints. "It's a case of the body mistakenly attacking its own tissue," Perez explained. Researchers suspect the disease results from a combination of a genetic predisposition triggered by a viral infection--including the virus responsible for mono.

Jessica's prognosis is mixed. Judging from the condition ofherjoints, she has a relatively mild case of the disease. However, the disease is most likely to go into remission when it strikes younger children. "When a teenager gets it, the chance of a remission is less likely" Perez told Jessica and Cissy.

Left untreated, JRA could destroy Jessica's cartilage, leaving herjoints disfigured and painful. Decades ago, sufferers ended up in wheelchairs or needed joint replacements. "Today we have medicines to prevent that. The most important thing is to begin treatment," Perez said. "This is manageable. Jessica will live a normal life. She can go to college, marry and have children."

When they left the doctor's office, Cissy and Jessica took with them two prescriptions, one for a drug to fight the inflammation and one to help Jessica sleep. They also had a letter from the physician to administrators at Jessica's school, asking to have her core classes grouped so she can attend just half a day. Perez thought a lighter load would help Jessica recuperate.

Stunned by the diagnosis, Cissy held her daughter. "Eveything will be all right," she assured her.

For the first time Jessica admitted to her mother how worried she'd been. "I'm just glad I'm not going to die," she said.

I wanted to cry." Cissy says later. "I didn't know Jessica thought she might die."

"I'M HAPPY WITH MYSELF"

"I want to have a good marriage. I want kids, at least four, a house with a white picket fence and everything," says Jcssica. "I want a big wedding and a beautiful white gown and my two dads walking me down the aisle.

After three months on arthritis medications, Jessica is back at Texas Children's for a follow-up appointment with Perez. She's feeling better, even inline skating again.

"l'm very pleased" Perez says, after examining Jessica. She tells the teen to continue taking the medication and attending half-days at school. "Then I'll see you in another- three months."

Later that dav, Jessica reflects or the lessons she's learned in her 16 years. "I think all I've been through has made Ine stronger and more confident," she says.

She says she never asks, Why me? "Everybody thinks I feel sorry for myself because of all the bad things that happened to me. I don't. I'm actually very happy with myself." she says. "Things that happen don't bother me as much as they might someone else. I know I call over-come them if l want to."

Listening to her daughter, Cissy grins proudly. "i've always told Jessica, 'Anything that comes along, we can lick" she says. "as long as we stick together."·

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